I Am Such An ID10T!  

Posted by Alex Laforest

Just a quick post to relate some anecdote not making me a hero or a genius, faaaaarrr from it :P.

Yesterday evening, I tried to stay away from poker, feeling I needed some sort of break from it all after tearing up the tables (tearing up might not be the best term here though; crashing, as in 'party crasher', would probably make more sense :P). So I went to a friend of mine's place, had a couple of beers and headed home with another buddy who wanted to look to buy a new laptop via my employer's deal. Which we did. Then, silly me, I offered to start a HORSE heads-up freezout, to which my buddy agreed hastily. 2 minutes later, we were sitting down and staring at our 2 hole cards, ready to battle. Everything is pretty even until that one hand. Just finished the Omaha level, I look at my 2 hole cards to find pocket Aces down there. A 4 of spades stares back at us from the first door card. My buddy-turned-enemy is also sitting on a 4, of diamonds no less :P. And then it happened... I go 'Low card opens up; that's you, since spades beat diamonds', and he opens up with the bring-in. I raise. He reraises. I re-reraise and he caps. Next door card for me is a King while he gets another diamond. Same drill; capped betting. Plus some light trash talking and gloating. Fifth street brings a deuce my way and the 5 of clubs to my buddy. I go "ooooh, you don't like that club", to which he answers dreamily "huh?". I say 'nevermind' and bet. He raises, asking "I don't get your club thingy?!?!?". I re-raise telling him to let it go. He flat calls. First betting round that didn't cap, by the way :P... Sixth street pairs my deuce while giving him a lousy, scattered, almost totally rainbow, definitely totally unconnected rag of a hand. Betting goes like 2 predators at each other's throat and his once more capped. i start talking while the seventh and final card is being delt. He looks at it and I say "before you bet, consider: 'do I beat a full house?', cause I've got another deuce in the pocket", to which he answers "What?!?!?! A full house?!?!? Off course I beat a full". I am stupefied, completely bewildered and go "Really? You really beat a boat??? I can't see how with your board...", and then, he delivers the proverbial nail in the coffin, the stake in the chest, saying, between an emerging laughing fit, "We're playing Razz, dude!!!". I melted. Literally.

God I'm dumb.

♠♥♦♣

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